I sat for hours in a tree stand last weekend, 18 feet up, harnessed in and occasionally, checking my Google Alerts on my iPhone for interesting articles from the world of the outdoors. You can only peer at a meadow and through binoculars for a few minutes at a time. And falling asleep isn’t an option, even while strapped in.
So, this story caught my interest – especially the headline that read, “Should gardeners urinate outdoors?” It seems The National Trust, in the U.K., advocates urinating outdoors to fertilize your garden and save on flushing the loo. I got to thinking that 1.1 million women hunters are saving the planet in this country, too, because there are several days each year that we abstain from flushing toilets across this great nation. We save millions of gallons of water and supposedly, we’re fertilizing hunting grounds.
It sounds like a great story problem to me. “If your mom and Aunt Sue are out hunting for three days and your mom goes to the bathroom umpteen times a day and your aunt goes 2.7358 times more often than your mother, then how many gallons of water have they saved during their hunting trip? (Hint: a pre-1994 U.S. toilet uses an average of 3.4 U.S. gallons, 2.8 imperial gallons, per flush.) Your mom and aunt use old toilets made in the USA.” OK, now have the kids move to the next problem that uses modern, water-saving toilets and figure the difference between the two. And then, have them write a five-paragraph standard essay using comparison and contrast about why new toilets are superior to old toilets, and a bonus for answering why men in the U.K. nip out to their gardens to pee on hay bales. In history class that day, students could study the history of the indoor restroom movement (couldn’t resist) and do a time line of plumbing, and in science, students could be assigned a science project on designing the toilet of the future and it must flush up. And I could go on and develop an entire curriculum regarding modern plumbing and in particular, toilets, but then I’d eventually get around to having to design a bulletin board.
I’d rather check for another Google Alert.
~Barbara Baird
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Publisher/Editor Barbara Baird is a freelance writer in hunting, shooting and outdoor markets. Her bylines are found at several top hunting and shooting publications. She also is a travel writer, and you can follow her at https://www.ozarkian.com. View all posts by Barbara Baird
That was just a warm up lady! Good to hear from you. It does make the time go faster to concoct story problems, but I see your point. Where did you have in mind?
Dawn: Good to hear from you. Saw you at Holly’s blog recently. What’s with your friend and not daring to test the wind first from her tree stand. 😉 She needs to have faith!
Hey Barb, that is a great idea. Use your Shewee while up in the tree too. Last week my friend (who had a Shewee in her pocket) opted to come out of her tree stand to take care of business. After she got all her gear back on and blew her nose she heard a rustle and turned to see a six point looking at her. Oops!
Urinating outdoors is a wonderful thing and so empowering too. So lets go ladies, stand up and take control and use your shewee to save the planet! (and millions of gallons of water too). Good luck Barb, I hope you get your deer! We are back into duck and goose season here in PA and I am happy as can be!
You’re onto something here, Babbs…not sure what, but you’re onto something…You Go Girl!!!
I think you’ve been in that tree stand near Rolla a little too long, Barb, when going wee-wee turns into a math problem. You desperately need somewhere with warm sand, salty ocean, margaritas, and little drinks with paper umbrellas in them.