I’ve been squirrel hunting in flannel pajamas, orange hat and Muck Boots. The territory? The perimeter of an old ranch house we inherited about 18 months ago, loaded with squirrels in the attic. Fortunately, it was squirrel season and I had a tag. I also had my trusty Ruger 10-22.
My husband took an easier approach, before I would go on jammie-patrol, as he sat on the front porch with his .22 pistol and a cup of coffee, enjoying the early morning sunrise and occasionally popping a squirrel as it came out from the attic and through the gutter trough.
Now, the ranch is being renovated and de-squirreled and the general contractor called me this morning to tell me that one little squirrel shut down all the power to the project and surrounding area by chewing through a line to the transformer. He said he heard some popping and fizzing and that the squirrel up high turned into toast and hung from the line right after the loud zapping sound.
The scene of the crime.
Now, that’s too bad – about the power outage and the death of a squirrel. However, if you’ve ever read any of Dean Koontz’s books, your imagination might tend to consider squirrels not as furry little cuties, but more like my pal Deb Ferns calls them, “Rats with good PR.”
I’ve heard squirrels scream like banshees right above my head in the wee hours of the morning, in the attic. I’ve seen them scurry up the sides of the house and disappear into a soffit crack. I’ve seen them fly through the air from a limb 10 feet away and grab the gutters. All while trying to get into my house.
And, the scariest thing … I’ve endured a stare-down with a squirrel in the woods one time, while sitting on turkey alert. It won.
My daughter-in-law, upon hearing of the squirrel that took on the transformer, said, “You’d better make sure all your windows that open have screens on them!”
Well, that’s already been covered. I just haven’t thought about what to do if they start staring at me through those windows!
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Publisher/Editor Barbara Baird is a freelance writer in hunting, shooting and outdoor markets. Her bylines are found at several top hunting and shooting publications. She also is a travel writer, and you can follow her at https://www.ozarkian.com. View all posts by Barbara Baird
lol, oh dear, the mental image of the hunting apparel, I fell out of my chair laughing.
Well, one thing’s for sure … you guys on a squirrel safari at my place would see and lot more squirrels than you saw at the other place!
Sounds like you need to call in the Smith & Wesson guys and have a Squirrel Safari. I’ve heard of “Bats in the Belfry,” you don’t want to be known as the lady with the “Squirrels in the Attic”!
Night vision goggles wouldn’t hurt either! That’s how I’ve had to hunt pack rats destroying wiring in our parked cars ($500 worth in one mini-van alone.) Now there’s a picture.. Barb in her jammies with night vision goggles…would make a great HBO comedy!